Ding-Dong-Merrily

It's been a while since I enlightened the world on my daily happenings so I thought an update was in order. Firstly, and in case you hadn't noticed, it was Christmas last week. A family affair for me.....back to the homestead in Bognor with the rents and added sibling.....no skiing, log cabins/fires or building snowmen for me....nope, and the extra chilly weather which we had been experiencing at least could have provided something in resemblance to 'Winter Wonderlandish' for extra Christmassiness (it can be a word), but this was replaced with the usual dark, cloudy and soggy on the day itself....yep traditional British Christmas weather right there.

As with most people Christmas traditions are upheld each year in our house (decorations, lights, listening to Christmas songs, arguments, ingestion of way too much chocolate and the need for Gaviscon) , the main one is to turn off the TV (not the whole time I hasten to add) and observe some quality family time in the guise of participation in 'fun' card and board games (non-optional.....unless you're mum, well she is in charge of the food provisions so if she wants to be the festive Grinch there's no argument from me). Cribbage, Uno, Trivial Pursuit and, the newly purchased, Underground: The London board game were the top choices this year. Fun and frolics were had by all, even though some, so called, family members lowered the wholesome tone by cheating, none too discreetly either *coughs* Sarah *coughs*....tables were turned however when father and I ganged up and gave her an arse whooping in a later game.....yep, like I said honest, wholesome family fun.

So, further to my Christmas round up another observed tradition is, or at least should be, watching the top Christmas TV line up, which this year equated to BBC's Oliver Twist (which was actually pre-Christmas), ITV's The Old Curiosity Shop, Eastenders (because absolute misery is a must for Christmas viewing) and Doctor Who (of course).....the latter was excellent even if it bore more than a passing resemblance to The Poseidon Adventure, but in space and with less Gene Hackman and a little more Kylie Minogue. Apart from that I was very thankful for the 11 DVDs I received from Santa, as the traditional Christmas TV fare was beyond pants....I mean seriously as pants go this was a choice of either grannies frilly pantaloons or discarded 1960's woollies, ripped and with skid marks.

So, the New Year is on the way....I'll soon be returning to the new postcode and hopefully may even find employment, if i can convince some silly bugger I'm worth it....for now though there's just enough time for me to whoop dad at Cribbage one last time.

Club Mercury's Final Christmas Do

Crikey, I've been busier in the last couple of days than I have been in the last six months. Visited the old haunting ground of Southampton yesterday, meeting up with Alison (times 2) Elin and Dan (the bat) for lunch and mass gossip session.

The poxy train took much longer than expected/advertised, which meant that the shopping I was going to do in the town had to be scrapped. Still, I had a decent chat with Alison, much laughs with Dan and when the other pair finally showed up (who knew it would be difficult to park in S'ton the week before x-mas) we ate food and made a mess with wrapping paper and envelopes. I'd gone with fluffy venereal diseases for Elin and Ally (Herpes and Syphilis to be exact) the gift which keeps on giving and can be shared with loved ones. (http://www.giantmicrobes.com/) thanks to the attached leaflet we all learnt something useful and tried to remember which monarch had gone doo-lally with the pink worm....I'm going with Nigel Hawthorne.

So, after our meal, and due to our current location being cold enough to freeze off brass monkeys (or however the phrase goes), we descended on a well known coffee house for hot chocolate and cake.....hmmmmmm. Not long after this I realised I was about to miss my train and hi-tailed it to the station....where I arrived just in time to see said train pulling out of the station and, subsequently, the rush-hour (which isn't rushed in any sense of the word, nor does it take an hour) journey took me just shy of 3 hours and 3 changes to get home.....by which time I was officially an Ems-sicle.

Today I wandered round pretty much every side road in the Worthing area shopping, seeing to appointments and generally getting my bearings (which was a little trial and error....with emphasis on the error), hopefully I'll be all over the direction stuff when I venture out tomorrow.

Irn Bru Christmas Ad

New Diggs

Officially got all moved into my room in the shared house in Worthing yesterday.....It was a relatively simple process, even if there was panicky moment when we thought that the TV wasn't going to work ( I hate technology it should be press button, switch on, does everything automatically, done)....but crisis was soon averted and my fabulous Viera switched on in all it's Technicolor glory.

Still need some storage, mainly for my excessive dvd collection, curtains (thankfully it's proper dark in the mornings at the moment) and some lamps to make it cozy. I also need to move some more stuff in, but since I'm back to Bognor next week for Christmas, that can wait.

One of my new housemates, Emma, had invited a couple of her friends round to watch the finale of (Fi)X-Factor and had prepared a bunch of tasty munchies. I decided to forgo the (Fi)X-Factor part of proceedings, retiring instead back to my room with a plate full of food to watch Robin Hood.

Speaking of, quite impressed by last nights episode....plenty of expected action and adventure, complete with a treasure hunt....who'd have thought it'd be the Oxo mum.....a randy Oxo mum apparently too. Marian got herself into to a right load of doo-doo....actually feeling sorry for Guy of Gisbourne, not only is he being led a merry dance by the young maiden but he seems to be the only bloke in Nottingham who can't recognise lady lumps under a tunic.....for heavens sake man, do you not have eyes!

Anyway, the Nightwatchman was revealed to Guy and then he and Alan covered it up to protect Marian in front of the sheriff....is Guy doing this out of the good of his heart or to manipulate Marian in the future.....hmmm it's a puzzler.

???????

The incomprehensible has happened....I just don't know what to do.....how will I possibly cope?......I just keep pinching myself hoping that it is in fact some kind of terrible nightmare, but then I open my eyes and see something which chills me to the core......

"No satellite signal is being received"

I'm not going to panic, nope...panic.....me....not going to happen....I can manage without television, it's not like I'm addicted or anything.....is it me or is it getting hot in here, my palms are getting awfully sweaty.......I'm just going to sit in the corner on my own for a while, hug a pillow and rock gently for a few hours......but not because I'm panicking.

T-Minus

I move house in four days....four days people and there's a whole bunch of stuff that needs to be sorted before then.....TV licence, wrap Christmas presents, arrange DSS appointment in Worthing Branch, get a job, write and post Christmas cards....and , um, well pack everything. Notice my priorities there, hmm maybe I should work through that 'to do' list backwards.

I'm sure there's a bunch of stuff which I've forgotten about which also need to be taken into consideration for the move....like why the heck am I moving house this close to Christmas....but certain parental factions are sure to have the slack and will probably be whipping me with it before long.....personally I'm of the 'chuck everything into a box and sort it out sometime in the future' vain of moving, but I'm not too sure how successful that will turn out...meh.

So the countdown continues and I'm sure there's something constructive I could be doing right now......Ooo, is that a split end...better sort that.

Robin of Muttley

Still finding Robin Hood relatively entertaining, it seems to have found a decent enough balance of swashbuckling, comedy and postmodern referencing. Though the other week Allan-a-Dale, after wrestling a nun into bushes (could have turned into a whole other show right there) was guilty of delivering the, ever-so-slightly, dodgy line of 'say a little prayer for me' before pegging it.

This evening I must admit I nearly laughed up a lung due to the gratuitous Hanna/Barbera ref.....I guess it was only a matter of time during an episode where the principle plot device was a pigeon...could have been worse, Little John could have sparked up a long distance relationship with Clara or perhaps Djaq could have had a Tet-a-tet with Dr Glossop while Much took his pet squirrel to see the wondrous and knowledgeable Macadoo.

In case you missed it the ref I am referring to is the sheriff's dialogue of 'Catch that pigeon.....Now!'

While I'm on dialogue there was some corking stuff in an episode a few weeks back delivered by the fantastically funny Josie Lawrence (whatever has she been doing since Who's Line....It's a puzzler), highlights included; 'Hello baldy' (to the sheriff), 'Slimey little snothead' (descriptive of Guy) and my personal favourite....'Hairy pig witted fox turd I’ll pluck your eyeballs from your bony skull and squelch them into cesspits'....a phrase which surely deserves to be integrated into modern societal dialect....for example when dealing with cold callers, mad drivers, chavs......and carol singers

My So Called Dad

My dad made me laugh today....we have the same puerile and sarcastic sense of humour and more often than not these days its the frequency of senile moments which has me in stitches, his joke telling is usually about as successful as a Tommy Cooper magic trick and not usually for the ears of the young and innocent like my good self.

While watching Are You Smarter Than a Ten Year Old? (I know but he’s retired and I’m unemployed) a contestant was asked a question which involved knowing numbers in French. Dad, who took some classes several years ago, dutifully rattled off 1-20 in French ( I think I was supposed to be impressed) and I said ‘but what about in German?’ dad paused a moment before retorting with Vun, Too, Sree, Vour etc….ala Allo Allo...poor old dad, growing up in the 50's what chance did he really have…Larry Grayson, Benny Hill and Tommy Cooper….I rest my case.

Buffy Fest '07

Visited Alison yesterday for a complete fest of all things Buffyverse...with a smidgen of Barrowman thrown in for good measure.

With junk food in abundance we got through a carefully selected 5 episodes of the hilarious fantasy series, one from each season: Nightmares, Go Fish, Band Candy, Superstar and finally Once More With Feeling. (time constraints meant skipping season 5 and 7 episodes for the delicious musical edition)

Revelling in the top notch action/drama, inventive/addictive dialogue, out dated SFX and a surprising amount of flashes of buff (the male kind not the character and mainly from Nic Brendon, but with added Marc Blucas, Wentworth Miller and David Borenanz) I gorged on Peanut M & M's and delved into an intellectual debate on the progression of 'meh' as a descriptive in modern language, as well as the obvious academic 'Buffyverse' debates....well reminiscing really...well I supposed it could be considered a flitting of trivia between two fangirls...at a squint....yes, I am that sad.

In all a good time was had by us both...and I was only slightly bothered that on my return journey my train was delayed by 20 mins putting me smack bang in the middle of rush hour on a train consisting of two carriages and nowhere near enough seats, sandwiched between a loved up couple incapable of orifice separation, a gaggle of chavs involved in the life changing conversation of Westlife or Boyzone and a middle aged woman who seemed unaware that mobile phones have a microphone, for 1hr 1/2....like i say, 'slightly' bothered.

You know what Doctor....You were MY Doctor

In the depths of the cheesiest excuse for entertainment which is Children in Need this evening I was treated to 8 minutes of pure genius from the pen of Steven Moffat. I am of course talking about the one off special Doctor Who: Time Crash which aired this evening.

Not only following on directly from the end of the previous series but incorporating a double helping of Doctor madness. The incorrigibly delightful David Tennant was joined by Peter Davison complete with Cricket jacket and accessorized vegetable on his lapel for 8 minutes of screen gold.....so good in fact that I hopped straight over to the website to watch again to make sure I hadn't missed anything.....and basically bathe in every utterly brilliant second.

Fast paced and utterly ridiculous dialogue, with some special self aware moments from Mr. Tennant, since like myself Peter Davison was my Doctor, the pair avert the end of the universe via a paradoxical impossibility only manageable in the realm of the Who.

Best quotes include:

'Fair play to you, not many people can carry off a decorative vegetable'

'Hey I'm the Doctor. I can save the universe with a kettle and some string....and look at me I'm wearing a vegetable'

'End of the universe butter-fingers'

If you did miss it, and it's understandable since you would have had to sit through a couple of hours of mind numbing pseudo entertainment disguised as a fund raiser, I bring you the direct link.....all hail me:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/pudsey/onthenight/article_doctorwho.shtml

Graduation

Okay, I'll get it over with because it's all very embarrassing....Graduation day was last Friday which involved dressing up in pompus, ill fitting, outfits and sitting through boring speeches and monotonous waiting for you name to be called to then experience a minute of utter terror in front of friends, family , lecturers and a couple of hundred complete strangers whilst trying to keep a mortar board balanced on your nogging and not be the person who trips on their gown to fall flat on their face.

It all went accordingly and was followed by a few minutes of posing for a gazillion photos, see above, before enjoying a meager buffet and chatting to friends and their families as well as catching up with lecturers Claire and Darren.....who called me a geek, ah how little he knows me after three years....as I am a total TV nut and nerd and proud of it.

Later I met up with the Club Mercury crowd for a reunion, of sorts, at the cheapest pub in Southampton. Lot of fun and merriment was had by all and I'm sure there are plenty of pics, due to me being nearly blind from the flash, and even a video out there somewhere in YouTube land....not giving you the link though.

Dad's Little Carrot

Not quite sure what to say about this root vegetable which my father has grown at his allotment....mum thought it was hilarious, but then again she always had a filthy mind....naturally I had to have the logistics of the 'funny' explained, because as you know I am as pure as the driven snow.

Movie Night

Had a fabulous time at my very good friend Clogs' place watching a mass of movies over the weekend. First up, in keeping with the forthcoming Halloween thingy coming up, we trolled through Final Destination 1, 2 and 3. Lots of gore, hilariously ludicrous deaths reminiscent of the utterly wonderful TV series Dead Like Me...what happened to Dead Like Me, were Americans worried it's individuality would cause them to engage some brain activity I wonder....after the back-to-back death, blood and 'ick factor which is the Final Destination films poor Chloe squeaked that fluffy bunnies and Disney should be the way to go next so we borrowed.....House of Wax (2005) from her housemate.

I've not seen the original but I fear it is better than this remake...blood, squeamish moments of both gore and the casts acting ability (Paris Hilton? WTF), stupid teenagers doing stupid things...copping off one moment and being impaled the next....blah...blah....blah....house of wax has mass meltdown....last surviving teens rescued and the complete unsurprse 'there is another murderer' conclusion.

From there we watched Disney's Aladdin and.....Annie, proper cheese, but magnificent production, when compared to what is classed as a musical production these days...don't even get me started on High School Musical....grrr arg!

Robin Hood this week continued to please..Robin actually showing a little menace and being all 'Douglas Fairbanks' down a flag on the outside of the castle (OK so it was mainly CGI but meh)....Was nice to see Will Scarlet have a bit of gumption for a change, reminiscent of Ray Winstone's portrayal of the character in RoS way back when (although not quite as utterly crazy). The only bit which was a tad annoying was the time it took for deathbed girl to be back to full of beans...bloody miracle cure that...still I suppose there was much to fit into the 45 mins this week. And next week it looks like the mole...aka Alan-a-Dale....has been rumbled, potentially a good angsty/action episode...I guess I'll have to wait and see.

Hey, Matthew

Bloody hell, this song is a blast from the past...some when around 1987...and yes I remember every single one of the shows mentioned.

Allusive Trophies and Plot Lines

Another day another England defeat, this time at the hands of South African in the Rugby World Cup. I'm not really into to Sport in general, I find the whole thing about as exciting as the blue rinse parade in Tesco on Pension day. Since there had been much 'hoohar' about this particular game, and the fact that Saturday television has seriously slim pickings these days, I thought I'd give it a go.

It was a very stop/go affair with seemingly endless rules and regulations to abide by during the play and endless scrums which don't really seem to achieve anything. England put in a fair effort....I think, it was sort of difficult to tell half the time since the ball spent most of it's time air bound....and at least we didn't get completely stuffed. Ultimately the game for me was 20% 'c'mon England' 40% confusion 15% 'we was robbed' 15% totty (well let's face it cauliflower ears and broken noses 'aint that attractive) and 10% triage. I think I'll stick to what I know...which brings me to.......

Robin Hood. Not a bad episode all told, though a bit lackluster in terms of action, bar a couple of fights between Guy and Robin. One or two funny one-liners, even verging on the risque at one point which was a surprise. A continuation of the 'turning' of outlaw Alan-a-Dale...still seems a bit far fetched considering that his own brother was murdered by the sheriff, but I'm interested to see where writers are going with it, since it's new to the story. And when are the sheriff and Guy going to realise that Marian is always going to take Robin's side...for heavens sake it's presented itself often enough, but the bumbling duo continue to give her a reprieve. A ladies moment...Guy with his shirt off looking slightly oiled and all pecked out....they can certainly continue with that particular line of presentation. The series continues to be fairly mediocre in terms of story, which is a shame because there is potential there if only they'd bite the bullet and run with it.....

Now with the BBC is serious financial discomfort I wonder whether Robin Hood will be a casualty in the near future, and then what will we have to look forward to...repeats, repeats and repeats.

Twenty Years On.....The Great Storm

Bloody hell, time does fly...apparently it's twenty years since the 'hurricane'/Great Storm/very high winds....to this day nobody can quite make up their mind....caused havoc across the country.

I was 8 years old at the time and so the memory here is a little hazy. What I do remember is being a little anxious about the huge pine tree which stands nearby as the winds outside became more and more ferocious. For several years after, every time high winds hit our area I would sleep on my mattress on the floor of my parents room, still convinced that the Pine tree would collapse onto the house....It's still standing to this day.

All I really recall is the sound that the winds made...a whistling which could have made my ears bleed.....Having since lived on the 13th floor during some severe stormy weather I don't envy the people who were living in Bognor's only tower block back in '87. My sister, ever diligent and aware of incidents happening around her....slept through the whole thing like the proverbial baby.

The morning after was a school day, dad had somehow managed to get to work and had phoned to say don't bother sending the kids in as the roads were pretty much impassable. Yes, my school was open after the worst storm in over 200 years....fools.

Us kids spent our day checking out the nearby damage. Several large trees had fallen across Aldwick Road near The Pound, windows were impossible to see through due to the layer upon layer of crap covering them, the dividing fence between us and the neighbours was demolished and the back gate seemed to have disappeared....we got off lucky in the area I guess, considering Sussex had seen some of the worst damage in the country.

Generally, I remember the potential for fun after the storm, due to the amount of felled trees which were so much easier to climb when horizontal. The family took a trip to the nearby Eartham Woods shortly after the storm and we were all disappointed as to how much had changed. A huge portion had been completely destroyed and I've only recently returned to the woods which once again resembles a proper woodland area.

More famously, large Estates became unrecognisable, roofs were ripped off flats in Littlehampton and other areas, caravan parks flattened, Seven Oaks became One Oak, power lines were down all over the place and Gordon Kaye (Renie from 'Allo 'Allo) was very nearly killed when a tree struck his car. It was all a little odd for an 8 year old to take in really, but I'm guessing it was the start of my fascination towards weird weather.

Cashback (2006)

Watched this fabulously brilliant, original and funny film last night. It mixes the banally mundane with a touch of romance with an intriguing fantasy twist, capturing in detail the observations of the main character Ben, played uncompromisingly well by Sean Biggerstaff (probably best remembered as Oliver Wood from Harry Potter). Why can't more films be this honest and pleasurable?

Robin Hood....Episode Two

I have to admit that tonight's episode of Robin Hood wasn't too bad....well that was less difficult than I thought it would be to say. Apart from the glaringly obvious green gaming tables in Nottingham Castle and a few contemporary phrases chucked in willy nilly it was actually rather entertaining. And if you think about it so much could have gone wrong in this episode.

So the premise was rather similar to three/ four (if you count the original) well known Hollywood heist movies and Jonas Armstrong can in no way be compared to the sex god who is George Clooney, but things moved along quite nicely, there was a little tension and a couple of good 'cor blimey' moments, which has previous been difficult to capture in the series due to the continuing theme of Robin the action hero....with 'PC' action.

Also Dexter Fletcher, yes, him off Hotel Babylon (for the youngsters)/Press Gang (for the over the hill mob) was better than expected as the German Count....when he first opened his mouth I inwardly groaned thinking the accent was going to be cringe worthy camped up (aka not unlike 'allo 'allo)...but instead it was passed off very well, pleasing mainly because Keith Allen has the monopoly on camp in this series.

So, in all a vast improvement on last weeks antics...now if the art department would actually sit back and look and the completely contemporary wardrobe and tone it down a tad then this series would actually stand a chance.

Sony Bravia - Play Doh

Bless those people at Sony who so some of the best adverts on the telly....bouncey balls in San Francisco, Paint Fireworks in Glasgow and now Play-Doh Rabbits in NYC...Genius.

Robin Hood....Seriously What Are They Thinking?

Since I just wrote a whole dissertation on the subject I thought I give the new version of Robin Hood another go. During the repeated viewing of the first series for my studies I realised there were parts which were actually quit good. However this was not a strong episode and had some pretty farcical moments too boot.

I know that it's supposed to be contemporary and that it's been a while since the target audience had something to compare it to but even so I'm pretty sure that descriptive word such as 'skanky' and 'manky' were not part of the slang in medieval times. Also post-modern popular cultural referencing can be funny and clever when used in the right scenario but I don't think 'It's goodbye from me...and it's goodbye from him' when leaving Nottingham Castle is it.

So the themes of the thing were that Robin is captured while carrying out some derring-do to protect a mother and her two young children from the evil Sheriff...and by 'evil' I obviously mean camp as hell. The 'mother' actually turns out to be the sheriff's sister who had used prosthetics and a wig to disguise herself...now what is (once again) wrong with that statement....PROSTHETICS.....there is absolutely now way I can justify that one....yes I know Robin was always disguising himself in the tales but it was always things like straw stuffed down his jumper, mud on his face (which I might add is something else missing from this medieval Britain) and a hood....not synthetic substances several hundred years out of date...grrr.

Its a shame really as there was some interesting themes...I like the idea of a turncoat within the midst of the 'outlaw' gang and that there was some actual use of the forest in hiding and making escape from a robbery...as is tradition. Unfortunately is the production continues with over compensating with the contemporary referencing fans will probably turn off in droves and a season 3 won't see the light of day....and therefore the family drama on a Saturday night will be lost again until the far superior Doctor Who returns.

In terms of Robin Hood...If its a enjoyably delicious, dark, moody and funny show full of swashbuckling action that you're after, then buy the box sets of Robin of Sherwood and watch repeatedly.