Something in the Air

This morning when I popped out to get the daily rag I noticed a funky smell in the air. As I crumpled my nose against the obnoxious fumes I realised I had a bag of kitchen rubbish in my hand, which I duly deposited into the dustbin at the end of the drive. I turned into the road to walk the few hundred yards to the newsagents, but a few paces in I once again noticed an offensive odour, had I in avertedly trodden in a deposit from the local mongrel community. I duly checked the soles of my shoes….all clean. Slightly puzzled I bought my newspaper (a term which loosely describes the Daily Mirror….but then I only really buy it for Andy Capp) and turned back to the house. The hairs in my nostrils continued to burn away from the odd smell likened only to what farmers spray on the fields….ah, farmers, that must be it, though admittedly those fields are a fair way off, but then there has been a prominent wind in the last couple of days…..and I can smell a bag of doughnuts a half a mile away so it is indeed possible.

It was only when reading the Beeb’s news online did I find I had almost been right in my assumption of the source of the smell….which is apparently….er….Mainland Europe. The strong Easterly winds we have been experiencing have brought to us all the polluted air across the channel and have been accosting sensitive noses all along the South of England…..One more utterly repugnant article to come out of Brussels then.

I realise that not everybody has yet been informed that the odour stems from our European neighbours…..and I’m slightly humoured by the fact that many thousands will be checking for ‘fudge’ smears on the bottom of their shoes for the rest of the day.

Oh....nearly forgot...I hereby dedicate this post to my sister who's Birthday it is today.....take from that what you will.