The Quirky World of Australian Soap

Okay...so I hate to return to this soap once again but the goings on in the Neighbours street are getting a little bizarre, so you have the regular type storylines, Janae worrying whether she has an STD and the various up/down relationships (currently the most interesting is the one between Toadie and Connor which sees them morphing into Lou and Harold) but then there was today's episode, which actually intergrated a musical number between Ned and Sky (oh and here's a piece of trivia; for those who don't already know Ned was the winner of Australia Idol and the guy who plays his brother Stuart was runner up of their version of Big Brother). So then Neighbours: The Musical?

Then there is of course Home and Away, the show which bought us dead people morphing out of a fridge now has dead people making Irene dinner, in scenes not too disimilar from a Sixth Sense ( though without the angry ghosts and the missing back of the head of a teenage boy). So obviously Irene is in somekind of complete mental breakdown, but it makes truely bizarre viewing. Then there was the closing credits when, after just witnessing the dinner with dead people scene, I voiced my slightly confused state by saying that it was a bit freaky...cut in announcers voiceover 'Freaky....absolutely'. I was like a scene from the Turman Show people!

Four Words!

Harry Hill's TV Burp.....excuse me but just what were ITV thinking, I admit I'm not really a Harry Hill fan, he just doesn't do it for me I'm afraid, but what on Earth is this mediocre comic doing on a prime time Saturday night viewing slot with a serious dodgy and totally unfunny look at the weeks television. For half an hour the viewer is subjected to canned laughter and, dare i say, applause for satirical examples from the soaps, odd dialogue, corny plots and bad acting for example (which anyone who watches soaps is not unaware of especially in the case of Corrie) but then there is also these ridiculous comedic, and i use the term extremely loosely, skits featuring Hill himself which are not only unfunny but have an element of the uncomfortable and the cringeworthy which I really don't think the British public should be subjected too.....Yes of course I could have changed the channel but Saturday night viewing is notoriously crap and my other choices at the time were: 'All time greatest movie songs', 'Flog It!', 'Supernanny' (a repeat) and 'Everbody Hates Chris' (also a repeat....which by the way is a whole other blog entry waiting to be written!)....so in conclusion I say 'come back Bullseye all is forgiven!'.

Neighbours pt 2

How can Paul be so deluded...even Izzy's onto Harold, and she should know a schemer when she sees one after all her schnannigans, but no Paul thinks he's trying to help him...by rattling windows and pulling out the phone cord when he's having a panic attack....it is indeed corny but all the same great afternoon television....what will the flipped out Harold do next? replace Paul's prosthetic leg with a rubber one and hang his favourite teddy....with Harold anything is possible, he's a man on the edge.

When Neighbour's Go Bad

In the storyline of the decade mild mannered, tuba playing, Samaritan Harold Bishop has been pushed over the line and gone all psycho and the victim of his wrath is none other than the formerly evil Paul Robinson. Lets face it people poor Harold hasn't had the best time of it over the years, he's recently lost his son and his family in a plane crash, his wife (the legendary Madge) died about five years ago, his daughter Kerry was killed on a duck hunt protest and Harold himself 'died' but was then found with a complete loss of memory years later. It's enough to drive anyone over the edge to be fair, but the bloke finally cracked last week and attempted to strangle Paul Robinson...somehow (a powercut caused me to miss the next episode) he managed to get away with that and poor old Paul has been suffering panic attacks ever since. Then this evening Harold turned all psycho again, knocking on windows and rattling blinds until Paul had some kind of seizure through fear. Harold chose his moment and pulled out the phone cord, hovering over the stricken man looking all threatening (I know it's hard to imagine Harold looking threatening....but if you squint it is possible) when.....to be continued.....

Thorpe Park Fun

My flatmate Ally's birthday is actually today but we decided a trip to Thorpe Park was is order whilst everyone was around. It was great fun, f**kin' freezing but great fun. We went on most things and I screamed and laughed alot....oh and we managed to not get stuck on the Slammer ride which a ton of people were stuck on for an hour in close to freezing temps when it broke down (oops).

The day went something like....up at stupid o'clock to drive up to Thrope Park, stood in a queue as it tried to snow getting tickets (eventhough we'd booked online), got in and headed straight for Vortex (a huge pengelum thingy which scared the crap out of me), stood in a queue for 45mins to go on Colossus (a rollercoaster with 9 or 10 twists one after the other), went inside to get warm and eat lunch, watch the other nutters of the gang go on Stealth (0-80 in 2.3 sec then up 205ft followed immediately by the drop!), across to nemesis Inferno (like the one in Alton Towers but better),Nat and I did the Monkee walk (badly) while the others tried their luck in the amusements, watched the gang go on the rapids (it was barely above freezing with a windchill which chilled us to the bone and Nigel wants to go on a ride which you get soaked...I don't think so), back on nemesis Inferno, back on Stealth (again I was a bit chicken/chief photo taker) then home.

After that wicked day, and after we thawed out, it was back to the flat for drinks, snacks and the opening of Ally's pressies....the only problem was that we were all a bunch of lightweights and slightly windburnt so we were all nodding by midnight....still we have copeous amounts of alcohol for a rainy day!

Creative Avoidance

Okay...So I have a presentation due on Wed, which I have yet to start but since I'm stalled on that right now I thought I'd write up a quick entry to my Blog instead...Then I might go and cook dinner, write an email or two, read a book, watch a DVD, clean the loo and probably do the presentation about 5 mins before it's due in.

Due South's been showing from the start on ITV 3 which is a ball, forgotten just how good and slightly surreal that show was, and how good looking the Mountie is. (which is the vote from the whole flat and not just my opinion so it must be true.)

In other news an Isle of Wight ferry crashed into the hard injuring 9 people last Friday, bit stupid if you ask me...Did the driver not see the huge mass of land, called the British Isles, approaching on his bow....doh!

The return of Hustle

Yes, the best show by far on the box returned last night and was quite an event in our flat, as we all bundled into Ally's room with eats and drink to enjoy the show. The storylines are as tight as ever, with a great performance from Mel Smtih by the way, and yet again I was wondering how on earth the team were going to get out of this complete f**k up with all their teeth (I have a feeling that the white haired bloke who was the original target might make another appearance toward the end of the series). And bless his heart if Eddie the barman didn't go and get in on the hustle for once, before being fleeced by the gang yet again. To sum up then; great writing, great acting, brilliantly edited ( and I love those frozen time sequences)....Here's to the next few weeks of top entertainment.

In other news, the cold has pretty much gone and, even more importantly, food no longer closely resembles the consistency of cardboard, I managed to write a 1,000 word essay in one night, we're going to Thorpe Park for Ally's 21st in a coupla weeks....And just when exactly did Grange Hill turn into Hollyoaks for the under 15's (it's just all gone terribly wrong there somewhere).

Quiet Night In

First off...Cold has progressed to a complete loss of voice, much to the amusement of my fellow flatmates, apparently I sound like a cross between Darth Vader and Orville the Duck?!? Was sposed to have dinner with the folks this afternoon but since my appetite has completely abated I phoned them to get a rain cheque, not that they could understand a word I said and in retrospect a text message would have been more appropriate....They came for a visit anyway, bringing some essentials; tissues, cough syrup, chicken soup and a big bag of jam doughnuts.....Lovely if I actually wanted them but I have to sit by and watch everyone else in the flat munch away while I hack up another phlegm ball (pretty image for ya there, feel my pain).

So, a quiet night in, in more ways than one and I'm running out of entertainment on the box, I caught the tail end of the eurovision thing and what I saw was not inspiring, some middle aged plonker trying to rap surrounded by twentysomething women dancers dressed in school uniform, both singing about preventing kids turning to crime whilst eerily looking decidedly dodgy.

And to the worst thing on, so far, tonight (Planet of the Apes being on C4 later) Casualty. I remember watching this as a kid and often being quite scared at the situations and blood, I don't think modern day kids have much to worry about. Boring, and gapingly obvious, plotlines with nothing slightly on the dramatic side, little blood, crap dialogue and even worse acting from the principle actors and especially the guest actors. In all pretty piss poor for a Saturdays' night viewing....I'd change the channel if I wasn't too ill to reach the remote.

Daytime

Currently ill in bed with a bad cold, I want to comment on the crapness of daytime TV....repeats, dodgy soaps, repeats, crappy chatshows...countdown (the only entertaining thing on), war films or westerns (BBC2 and C4 really need to update thier movie list) oh and did I mention repeats. How difficult is it to put on decent TV during the day...I have digital which repeats stuff endlessly, even showing the same programme several times on the same day...Is that what i pay my license for.....bloody repeats!

Top Weekend!

As it says on the tin.....saw Editors, whom I previously knew nowt about but absolutely rocked! then back to the flat where there was copious amounts of alcohol and a drinking game in full swing. The pics (of publishing quality) will be posted when I manage to scrounge copies of folk; highlights include trolley surfing, lift streaking and what is best described as socks...only a select few have the inside knowledge on that one!












In other news Life On Mars finished it's meger 8 episode run on Mon night, not that I'm complaining about the show because it's the dogs but 8 episodes, come on people, throw some funding Kudos' way already would ya! roll on the next season! at least there's still Prison Break and Supernatural to take away the post life on Mars blues.

Just remembered I forgot it was pancake day today.....poo....then again I had waaaay too much choc stuff over the weekend....off to get me some bifidus digestivum!